why last night made me so glad we hired a doula

This is how our night went last night...

We ate chicken, tomatoe and lettuce sandwiches and then watched i am number 4 (don't rush out to see that one anytime soon...)

I complained, and complained some more about the constant burning across my chest and the pain all over my stomach.

My stomach got hard, then it got soft, then it got hard, then it got soft... you get the drift..

It's 2 am and I still haven't fallen asleep... not even for a minute.  At this point I really don't know if I am having contractions.  I feel like puking and have been to the washroom at least 10 times.  I wake up Andrew and I am a weepy, pathetic mess.

We decide that we should call triage.  We try to locate the triage number and fail.  We contemplate driving to triage but I really didn't want to do that.

We go for a walk.

I decide to try sleeping in a chair, Heidi decides to join me.  That doesn't really work out.

Some unknown ridiculous hour I try the whole bed thing again and it works.

I wake up to Andrew dressed in jeans and a t-shirt and he is working from home.  We both look like zombies.

I am used to the sleep deprivation.  That I can handle.  What I can't handle is the ... is this go time or is this just a shitty time situation.

This morning I realize that as bad as last night was I feel so great about hiring that doula.  I mean clearly neither of us knows what we are doing.  In the moment I just want him to make me feel better but how is he supposed to know how to do that when I have zero clue about what exactly will make me feel better.  Our doula has done this before.  She has several children of her own and has been to countless births.

Big sigh... last night wasn't so bad after-all.

Sunset Cloud over the Atlantic Ocean by 4blankwalls via etsy


  1. I'm right there with you. Things are getting quite hard and trust me you're not alone. This could definitely describe one of my recent sleepless nights. Glad you have support in a doula! Hang in there. It's the homestretch now.

  2. Oooh! You might be getting close! Yeah for a doula. I am wishing I had gotten one. I think it's too late :(

  3. @definigfamily - I just checked your update and you must be so happy to be going home! So awful about the rash though, you've been through so much. The end is in sight so hang in there with me!

  4. @My Vegas - you're 31 weeks yes? I would think you would still have time depending on where you live and how many doulas are available.

  5. you are so courageous! i have no experience in this department but i've been following along and am sending you virtual positive vibes! ;)

  6. Here's to hoping that last night you were able to get some much needed rest! Hang in there Ashley...you are so close!

  7. Oh man! Scary! Although at this point your babies would be just fine! Glad it wasn't the "real deal" and I hope you can keep them in at least a couple more weeks!


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